Archives for August 2002

Fantasy Football

Although the term fantasy football may give people the vision of John Madden lying naked spread eagle with 18 drum sticks fastened to his body, this is not the case.

Fantasy Football is not just a little game where sports enthusiasts flock to each other and try to pickup the next Walter Payton, it is a brotherhood. Trash is talked. Egos are hurt, then mended, only to be hurt some more. Last years champion could very well be this years loser. Marshall Faulk could go down in the first game of the season, or he could very well the leagues’ best player once again. Fantasy Football has about as much certainty as the plot to Memento. And that is why I love it! You can draft the best team ever assembled, and all it takes is a few ligaments on a few knees, an ankle here or there, a minor case of heat stroke, or even an ingrown toenail, to make your season a mess. All of this makes the most entertaining game in the world more entertaining. Every single NFL game is important with fantasy football. Every minute detail. A last minute touchdown by a washed up has been can lead to fantasy victory. Every yard counts. Every play counts. So if you’re planning on seeing me during any of the next 17 sundays, you’re gonna have to gas up your car, and drive to my apartment, because I’M WATCHING THE GAME! Of course on Monday nights I will be fantasizing about John Madden some more.


Kareoke (spelling?) that the Japanese pronounce Car-eh-oh-kay, or the ancient art of singing off key to songs that everyone should know, but most people only know the chorus to, may the funnest thing that you could ever do. Seriously. Don’t knock it ’till you tried it. I have gone to do it a couple of times and I am almost to the point of doing it sober. And when the day comes that everyone can do that [sing kareoke], there will be no more war, murders, or unhappiness. Music is cool.