The Jeff Sauer Experience v7.0

We arrived at Edinburgh airport, got our bags, and took a bus to the city center (basically downtown Edinburgh). We then took a cab to the Flockhart’s house, where a barbeque was taking place. Becky and I were travel weary, and tired after staying up for over 24 consecutive hours at this point, but we decided to try our best to stay up and hang out at the barbeque, rather than fall asleep somewhere.

It only took about 10 minutes for me to crack my first beer! Being that I was on vacation in Europe, a mecca for exotic and distinct libations, I figured that I would have an opportunity to enjoy a great brew. Perhaps something local, or at the very least European.

So, when it came time to make a choice, guess which beer I was given? Miller Genuine Draft, or as I like to call it “dad beer”. Great. Not a big deal, of course (it was still beer, and I was still enjoying myself at this backyard barbeque), it’s just weird to come to Scotland with high hopes of ditching American customs and culture for a few weeks and then immediately be given American beer training wheels.

I hope that last paragraph doesn’t make me seem like an ungrateful asshole, that wasn’t the intention. In fact, I rather fancied the beer that I was given, and drank it with a debt of gratitude. I did the same for the next two beers as well. Then it was time to go and get settled in the flat that we would be staying in for our fortnight (to clarify, a flat is how you refer to apartment buildings and a fortnight is a time span of two weeks).

The flat was nice, and will be a great place to stay for two weeks. There were two bedrooms for sleeping, couches, a TV and many other modern conveniences. Most importantly, there was an Internet connection!! Jackpot!

Knowing my reliance on the Internet, I wanted to check right away to see if I could get my computer to connect to the net. So, I was saddened to that when I plugged the Ethernet cable into my computer and it didn’t work! I’m not even sure why it didn’t work. It could have been that the UK has a different way of connecting to the net, or it could have been the settings on my computer, but no matter what the problem was, I wasn’t able to connect!

This has happened to me several times in the past, so it didn’t alarm me. In fact, it gave me a chance to test my improvisation skills. I knew that in order to get the Internet to work properly, I would probably need an Internet router. By dumb luck (or possibly pure genius), I actually brought a router with me on the trip! Why did I bring a router? Well, because it’s actually the piece of equipment that I use for vonage, which is the VOIP line I use to make phone calls. Vonage allows you to use your Internet connection to make phone calls, and it is not geographically limited. I can actually bring the router with me to anywhere in the world, and make calls using my local 612 number, for free!! Pretty cool if you ask me.

So, I tried plugging the router into the outlet. Of course, it wasn’t that easy, since the UK and US have different types of plugins. Fortunately, I knew about this and bought a few adapters from Radio Shack before I left for the trip. I plugged the adapter into the outlet, and then the power thing into the adapter. Last, I plugged the power cable into the router. Suddenly, there was smoke and the horrible smell of a burning electrical fire! I guess my adapter didn’t work very well!

I actually did some decent damage to the electrical of the flat I was staying in. I tripped a circuit that powered 80% of the house, including the two bedrooms, living room and kitchen (I didn’t know it affected all of these areas until the next day, when the fridge was starting to defrost and melt). I realized that the smoking of electrical had caused the two bedrooms to lose power, but there wasn’t really anything I could do to fix it at the moment.

So, rather than dwell on the power situation, we decided to go back to the Flockhart’s barbeque, which was in full force at this point in the evening. I got some more beer and had a sausage sandwich, traditional Scottish style. It was excellent, and really hit the spot. We drank some more beer, and then I realized that my arm was starting to itch.

I looked down and realized that not only was my arm itching, but I also had a serious rash! As you can tell from the picture, the rash was basically covering both of my arms. I tried to find out what caused the rash, but I really wasn’t sure. The only thing out of the ordinary that I had to eat was some sausages, and the only other thing that I could think of was a plant allergy. Either way, it wasn’t looking good!

I decided to ask some other people to see what they thought was wrong with me, and nobody really seemed to know the source of my rash. The most definitive answer that I got was the diagnosis from Vivienne, a lovely Scottish girl who happened to be sitting near me when I discovered my rash. I actually took a video of her diagnosis, just because I had never heard them before. Here is her diagnosis:

“You have Midgie Bites”

Yes, I was covered in Midgie bites!

Apparently, Midgies are small flies that are native to Scotland, and leave bites of this nature. From the description of those who explained them to me, it sounds like they are very similar to gnats.

I showed my Midgie bites to others, and they told me that they didn’t think that they were Midgie bites at all. They thought it was an allergic reaction that caused the rash (that was my thought as well). Regardless of the cause of my rash, it was pretty gross, and a little scary for me at the time. It’s never good to start off a vacation with an ailment like this, but I can assure you that it hasn’t affected me much to this point, other than a slight discoloration/rash.

Once I got over my rash, I started imbibing mass quantities of adult beverages. I made a lot of new Scottish friends, and enjoyed myself immensely throughout the night. We partied until 3 AM, and had a great, great time. Everyone was so kind to me, and very accepting, and I didn’t have any communication problems. In fact, I’m surprised how well I was able to communicate with everyone.

I took some awesome videos throughout the night, and I have uploaded them to YouTube so that you may enjoy them. The first is a video of a man named Mark McCurdy singing a Karaoke version of Outkast’s “Hey Ya”. It’s a great rendition, and makes me laugh every time I watch it (pay particular attention to the people dancing in the background).

Mark McCurdy singing “Hey Ya”

The second and third videos are from inside the house party. They are of my newfound friends singing chants for their favorite football club, the Hearts. More specifically, they are singing chants for the Heart of Midlothian soccer team, which is based in Edinburgh. Enjoy and I’ll be posting day 3 some time tomorrow!

Hearts Chant #1

Hearts Chant #2

Traveling