Archives for December 2007

My Favorite Web Sites: Part 1

As part of my livelihood, as well as lifestyle, I am required to be on the Internet pretty much all the time. As a result, I come across awesome web sites pretty much every single day. I am always emailing and IM’ing the funny sites that I find to my friends, and I figured I should also post some of them on here too. Check these out!

Site Hot Chicks with Douche Bags

Synopsis – This site is amazing. The author (DB1), posts pictures of beautiful women accompanied by guys who are total Douche Bags. He posts several times a day, and it is always hilarious. There is at least one post a day that makes me literally laugh out loud. I wish I would have come up with this idea years ago when I defined the term “Douche Nozzle” on the Urban Dictionary (I am sowcow50).

Signature PostThe Gator. This guy is the epitome of douchedom; the fake tan, the blank stare, the overly tight shirt. You name it, he can ‘bag it.

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My Favorite City in Europe; Barcelona, Spain

After spending over a week in Europe, and not being able to speak the common language of the public, I was delighted to be heading to Barcelona for a weekend trip. I took countless years of Spanish in high school and actually was proficient enough in the language that I tested out of my college language requirement. For whatever reason, I just naturally picked up Spanish without even studying. I think it has to do with the fact that my family watched the movie La Bamba like 500 times when I was growing up, and the fact that I have a Mexican uncle. Or maybe I was just born to speak Spanish; who knows.

Anyway, after spending a week in Europe, and the only words that people said to me in public were “Speak English?” from the beggars in Paris and “Hey man, Coke” from the drug dealers in Amsterdam, I was totally pumped to use my Spanish while in Barcelona.

Fly Ryan Air... if you are dirt poor and don't care if you dieSince Barcelona was pretty far away from Brussels, taking a train was not an option. Fortunately, there is a discount airline that flies out of a town called Charleroi (which is south of Brussels), that offered flights to the Barcelona area for like 100 Euros (commercial airlines charged 400-500 for the same flight). The airline is called Ryan air, and it is pretty well known in Europe as the cheap way to travel. For those of you who haven’t traveled the airline, imagine flying on Sun Country airlines with the self seating arrangement of Southwest airlines. Throw in a dash of utter chaos, some rough landings, and a perfect 10 on the “there’s a good chance I’m going to shit my pants on this flight because I’m scared that we’re going to die” scale, and you have Ryan air.

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A Night in Amsterdam, the Netherlands

Tyler and I went to Amsterdam on a Wednesday for one night. Coincidentally, two business associates of mine, Dallas and Rob, were actually in Amsterdam at the same time, meeting with the Dutch company that we sell coffee for in the US. The company is called Smit and Dorlas, and they are headquartered in Amsterdam. Our site is the exclusive seller of this coffee in the USA. It’s some great coffee, so buy some if you’re a coffee aficianado!

We arrived in Amsterdam via a train from Paris. It was a 4 hour train ride, which was sort of annoying because it ate up much of our day, but it was nice because the train took us right into Amsterdam’s central train station, so we were about 2 blocks from our hotel when we arrived. I booked the hotel online (much like I did for Paris), so I had no idea what to expect. Booking hotels in Europe is a complete crapshoot. You can pay over $100 Euro a night for a shoe box of a hotel (aka our France hotel), or you can pay the same or less for a gigantic room right in the center of the city (which happened to us in Amsterdam).

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My thoughts on Paris, France

There’s nothing more romantic than spending two nights in Paris with your friend since 3rd grade. On second thought, I hope that there’s a lot of things that are much more romantic than this scenario. Anyway, Ty and I went to Paris about 5 days into our Europe trip, and we ended up having a great time. We got lucky as well, because this is a trip that almost never happened.

The night before we were supposed to leave for Paris, Ty came down with an illness. This wasn’t good, because when Ty gets sick, he REALLY gets sick. I could hardly sleep that night because I was worried that if Tyler couldn’t go to Paris (we had already booked hotels and $400 worth of train tickets), then this could really throw off our entire Europe trip.

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An Afternoon in Antwerp, Belgium

Cool sign in the train terminalAfter spending a few days in Brussels, we decided that we needed a change of scenery. We went to the train station, and on a whim, we chose to board a train to Antwerp (quite inexpensive too, about $4 US). None of us knew much about the town (go figure), so we just decided to hop on a train and check things out. The train ride took about 40 minutes, and we were immediately impressed by the beauty of Antwerp.

Cool buildings all aroundWe left the train station and walked around with no destination in mind. Within a few minutes it became clear that we made a good choice in visiting Antwerp. The town was beautiful, busy, and had the perfect combination of modernity and history. There was a very long street filled with every designer shop imaginable. Just beyond the street, we could see a towering cathedral peaking out above the buildings. We walked down the street with the cathedral as our ultimate destination.
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Reflections on Brussels, Belgium

Brussels is the town where I spent most of my time while I was in Europe. Tyler and I flew into Brussels, and spent the entire first day trying to find the place we were staying in Waterloo, which is a town about 10 miles south of Brussels. This is where Tyler’s girlfriend, Aly, was staying, and she had arranged for us to stay there for a few days during our trip (as well as leave our large suitcases at the house so we didn’t have to carry them around all day).

Leading up to the trip, Tyler and I hadn’t really done any research at all as to where we were staying. In our defense, we were both working 14 hour days trying to get enough work completed so that we could justify leaving the country for 2 weeks. We were so ill-prepared that we didn’t even know the official language of Belgium! We soon learned that it was French (with Flemish also being spoken), but that didn’t help us much, since neither of us knew a single word of French. Yes, we were typical stupid Americans, but we were determined not to propel that stereotype, so we did our best to fit in. This didn’t always work very well.

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Does Anybody Even Eat The Cranberries?

I started writing this on Thanksgiving, but forgot to finish until now

While I feel that I am an excellent long term planner (far beyond my years, actually), I am not very bright when it comes to planning for the short term. Generally I’m resourceful enough to overcome this lack of planning ability, but sometimes things are beyond my control. Case in point, Thanksgiving.

This year I was going to family Thanksgiving in St. Cloud like my family does every other year. I’m at the point now where I’m old enough that I am required to bring a side dish of some sort to family functions, and this time my mission was cranberry sauce. Naturally, I forgot that I was supposed to bring something, and didn’t buy Cranberry sauce during the week as I should have.

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My Top 10 Favorite Jeffsauer.com Posts

In honor of the new post rating system that I implemented this weekend, I thought I would compile a list of my 10 favorite posts in the history of this site.

10. I believe
Me in a nutshell. In this post I outline my beliefs, which are inane, petty and often far-fetched. If you ever wanted to know what I stand for, read this one!

9. Romeo Must Die… So Must Whitey
I thought I was going to see a movie, but I ended up being scared for my life. Find out why.

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Now You Can Vote For Your Favorite Stories

Please note that this is my 100th post on this site! I celebration of that feat, I am adding a new feature. Read on.

I have been publishing stupid stories on my web site since 2000. It started when I was in college doing web design at St. Thomas. I made a site on the St. Thomas server (It was iss.stthomas.edu/sauerw to be exact), and used Cold Fusion to post my thoughts for my friends. The only way you could get to the site was through my AOL Instant Messenger profile (sowcow50). People started reading my site for whatever reason, and I started to get a decent number of people who would email me/call me/talk to me at parties saying that they had read my web site and thought it was funny. So, I kept on posting, and it has gone from there. Some months I would post every day, but ever since I graduated college, my post frequency has declined to a high of 1-2 posts a month to a low of one post a quarter (with the exception of my travel diaries, which are often posted daily).

I guess I just created this site to write stuff. There was no commercial intent, no real reason for the site at all, other than to just write stuff when I was bored. Somehow it has caught on among people that I know and don’t know, and now I get thousands of visitors a month, and the number of visitors increases each and every month! I swear that I don’t even know that many people, but somehow people keep coming back.

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