Random Thoughts on the mother of all holidays.

Why do we call it Thanksgiving? Who are we giving thanks to? Are we showing our thanks to our relatives by eating their food? Does pumpkin pie mean that you’re more thankful than pecan pie? If you go up for 8ths on green bean casserole, does that mean that you are the most thankful of all? If that is the case, then I am the most thankful person in the world!

Thanksgiving is a day where everyone stuffs themselves until they pee cranberry sauce. Yet we never really have established who we are thanking, and who is giving. I say we thank the turkey, for being put on this earth. They are truly giving the most, they are giving their innocent little turkey lives so we can all eat until our arteries take over our lives. What about the pumpkins? Those smiley faced bastards are always so happy (well, some have scary faces, but we forgive them for it!) and all we do is purree them into a pulp, and then dallop them with whipped cream. What about whipped cream? Truly the unsung hero of every single dessert. We need to thank these heroes, for making our thanksgiving the best holiday ever! We must thank the malted hops and grapes that make up the fermented beverages we consume along with our turkey. We must thank the state of Idaho for growing a hardy bunch of russets that adorn our table along with gravy. We need to thank the lady who invented stuffing, because stuffing is the single best part of thanksgiving dinner.

And last, but not least, we must thank each other. We must thank each other for being there the 364 other days a year when thanking your friends is not a cool thing to do. We need to thank each other for being so ungodly awesome, and making our life so much fun to live. I love you all.